Chivralry i'snt dead? YET

Most of my readers are between 18-45 and the majority have the same damn question, "how and what do I need to do get a husband" or even a commitment. My first response is have you prayed for the exact man you want from his feet to his penis size to his brain to his ability to take care of you when you cant take care of yourself and what you would like him to treat you like most importantly!

Finding a good man today is very hard, especially when you have girls giving it up for a pair of designer shoes or a new handbag, but chivalry isn't dead, we just stop believing in it! I have been married six years, and believe me it hasn't always been great, but the one thing that kept me around was the love and respect I have the commitment I made to my husband and to GOD, now we both give each other plenty reasons to leave, but we decided to stay and make it work, and put GOD in the middle and not everybody else, trust me my man  has his flaws and I have mine, but when you find that one, you make it work, but always have enough sense to walk away when all avenues have been exhausted.

 Marriage isn't for everybody, and I'm not preaching that, but we all deserve to be loved and respected, so don't give up so easy, the next time you meet some one, don't count him out because he works at Wendy's at least he's working, don't give up on him cause he got 2 kids, as long as he is taking care of them give him some credit, but my point is this, we give up all the goodies and then find out all the flaws these dudes have SLOW DOWN, date a little , ask tons of questions, spend time around his friends and see how he acts, take him around your friends and see how he acts. Stop meeting at bars, nightclubs and don't be afraid or embarrassed to go online to find a match.

There are plenty reputable websites out there with  good success rates. Ladies listen bottom line. Keep your legs closed and ears Open and you might discover some things about yourself you never knew before.


Love yourself first and the rest will follow (peace and love)
SNB

CUDDLE BUDDIES? IS COLD WEATHER A GOOD EXCUSE TO CUDDLE WITHOUT COMMITMENT?

Baby It's Cold Outside

As the days get colder do you find yourself with an unresitable urge to cuddle without commitment? Lets face it.. Who wants to be alone when its cold outside, I don't and yes we all have been guilty of cuddling without commitment before.

Do you find yourself on some of these lonely cold nights searching through your call log or address book in search of a cuddle buddy? im sure we all are guilty of it but how do you balance cuddling for comfort or cuddling in search of commitment? Here a few signs that you're cuddling for commitment:

1. You find yourself thinking about this person more than usual.

2.  You find yourself dressing up just to be undressed.

3. You haven't gone out with, called or text any other potentials in the last few weeks.

4. Most of your conversations are about them.

5. You want to take your cuddle buddy public.

Im all for having a cuddle buddy, but make sure your heart is in the right place when his hands aren't, and as long as you realize your just cuddling with no strings attached. GO FOR IT....

make love not war...

"The Playbook" Dating Guidelines for 21st Century

"The Playbook"

After hundreds of conversations talking about dating rules, dating etiquette and giving advice I  decided to share some of the rules from my personal playbook on getting the guy you want, and ultimately "getting the ring"

The dating game has changed so much these days, and the methods or lack their of have really left the scales unbalanced. Men seem to have the upper hand, and women seem to be doing just about anything and getting nothing in return. What happened to "The Rules" a silent set of guidelines passed down from generation to generation. I will post a few rules that worked for me, regardless if your trying to get married or  fall in love, or just have a successful date try to incorporate some of these tips and I guarantee you will see things changing and the pendulum swinging more your way, and the men thirsting for more.

1. Never answer the phone on the first ring.

2. when asked are you available, in the beginning always appear to be unavailable and busy, but let him now you will have to get back to him on that, and if you really want to go out with him, let it be on your terms, your time and location.

3. Always end the conversation first. to much chatting sends the wrong message

4. Always end the date first. Don't let the date drag over into the quiet zone because the date was to long.

5. Never drink alcohol on the first date this always leads to trouble, either you or he reveals to much to soon or someone gets drunk and drunk is a sign of a person who can not stay in control of them self.

6. Never discuss your ex relationships with your date, don't make comparisons

7. Never talk about prior relationships and how many sexual partners you may have had or not

8. Do not talk about SEX on the first couple dates, its inappropriate  and can be misleading and overall tacky

9 Stay away from office romances they always end up bad, and you will be the topic of conversation by the water cooler one day.

10.Remember if a man wants to see you again he will call, no man is that busy, if he doesn't call you back,accept that he may not be into you and then move on, their are more fish in the sea.

How do you know when its time to say goodbye?

The purpose of a relationship is to add substance to your life, a relationship should add to the quality of your life, it should not take away from your life and make you feel unhappy, obligated or lonely and if it does than maybe its time to say goodbye! Here a few tips on why you may have to say goodbye to your significant other

1.Your sad most of the time, even when he or she is around you don't feel good about yourself or the relationship.

2. You feel emotionally disconnected, if your partner is sleeping on the couch without you for more than a few nights: "Houston you have a problem"

3. You find yourself changing your values and beliefs to accommodate your partner in hopes of making them happy.

4. Your partner is physically or verbally abusive, they try to control you with violence and  put you down continuously, noting you do is good enough, in their opinion.

5. You don't trust your partner when he or she is not around. If you feel the minute your partner leaves you he or she is possibly talking, texting or spending time with another women.

6. If you just aren't happy with things, we are always looking for a reason to break-up ie, a fight, someone cheating, have enough confidence in yourself if you just are not happy with someone that is reason enough to leave.

7. You are not satisfied sexually anymore. There i'snt  much more to that, sex isn't everything but its very important.

These are just a few things I wanted to share with you guys I hope you find peace and happiness inside yourself first, and don't be afraid to be alone sometimes. Not being in a realtionship gives you time to figure out what you want and what you are not willing to give up and being alone sometimes can prepare you for the best relationship in your life.